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Crazy guy emailed me thru Craigslist

Mazarin

By Mazarin,
in Just plain ol' B.S.

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Mazarin Newbie

Mazarin

Posted
Posted

Some of you that know me know I'm not the kind of person that's going to seriously get involved w/ a stupid internet argument. I'm all for discussions and even a spirited debate or two. The typical "NO U" arguments online get ignored by me.

 

But this guy was just too good to leave alone.

 

I had posted the "Stealership stole from me" story on Craigslist under the Chicagoland Auto Dealer Sales listings. I had a couple people email me saying they had the same issue w/ them and that they tell everyone they know, too. But one guy didn't quite agree w/ me and was actually pretty intense about how wrong I was. I've posted the email in reverse order so you can read it easier. These emails are completely unedited except for foul language, the email addresses being hidden, and my emails being in bold:

 

From: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

Subject: RE: craigslist post

To: Mazarin

Date: Friday, May 29, 2009, 7:40 PM

 

Sounds like the whole situation would have never happened in the 1st place If your credit didn't suck ~ You should have paid your bills on time....

 

What happened was they had a person who wanted to buy something they couldn't afford (YOU) in the 1st place. Chances are the needed a credit buyer at the bank to look at your s****y credit, You mentioned after work and

nights in your stupid post guess what bankers work normal hours - like you.

 

That's why you didn't drive the car home the 1st night, and when they had a 2nd buyer for the car they sold it to someone who was credit worthy - unlike yourself.

 

Dealers don't make decisions on credit, banks do. The dealer in nothing more than a middle man between you and the bank's.

 

Guess what the dealer lost out on a lot more then the $40.00 ~ you are complaining about

 

For 4 day's you wasted the time of your Salesman - Sales Manager - Finance Manager - just to name a few.

 

All of these people only get paid when the actually sell a car -(their is no "A" for effort)

 

Selling cars is how the pay their Mortgages,Their Com Ed,Nicor,Cable,Daycare, Buy food for their families - Etc.

 

That's why they worked so hard to make the deal right for your whiny a**.

 

Stupid people like you is why the world is like it is!

 

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Date: Fri, 29 May 2009 18:14:20 -0700

From: Mazarin

Subject: RE: craigslist post

To: xxxxxxxxx

 

Ok, sure. First, I see you didn't read the entire posting and see that someone I COSIGNED for ruined my credit. And second, I'm so sorry. I'm sure I'm the reason GM is filing for bankruptcy Monday.

 

Have a nice day d***head. Hope you have a job Tuesday!

 

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From: hi their <xxxxxxxx>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Saturday, May 30, 2009 3:47:39 AM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

OK STUPID A** ~

GM & THEM FILING B.K. HAS MORE TO WITH THE GOVERNMENT ~ NOT PROTECTING THE AMERICAN PEOPLE THE MAIN THING WAS NAFTA & WORLD WIDE TRADE THAT ALLOWED FOREIGN COMPANY'S COMING IN TO OUR COUNTRY AND BEING ABLE TO OFFER THEIR PRODUCT'S WITH OUT PAYING THE HIGH TARIFF'S & OUR AMERICAN COMPANY'S BEING ALLOWED TO MAKE OUR PRODUCTS OVER SEAS AND SHIPPING THEM BACK HERE AFTER TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MUCH LOWER WAGES - THIS HAPPENED WITH CELL PHONES (MOTOROLA VS NOKIA) DID YOU KNOW THAT JAPAN STOCK PILED EQUIPMENT FROM MOTOROLA AND JUST DESTROYED IT TO AVOID PAYING THE TARIFF'S THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN IMPOSED ON THEIR COUNTRY IF THEY HAD JUST TRIED TO SHIP THEIR PHONES INTO AMERICA? THEY SUPPORTED THE OWN PRODUCT AND DIDN'T FLOOD THEIR MARKET/ PEOPLE... W/ AMERICAN MADE PRODUCT'S - LOOK AT WHAT NIKE DID TO AVOID PAYING THE AMERICAN WAGES - SAME AS WAL-MART... LOOK AT THE THINGS PEOPLE ARE DOING W/ MEDICINE - GOING TO CANADA & MEXICO / EUROPE

TAKE A LOOK @ THE AMERICAN LABOR - AND ALL THE PEOPLE WITH OUT JOB'S BUT WE SUPPORT ILLEGAL WORKERS ...

I WALKED INTO A WENDY AND PEOPLE AT THE COUNTER COULDN'T UNDERSTAND I DIDN'T WANT MAYO THE CASHIER JUST KEPT SAYING WHAT NUMBER .... NOW I'M WASTING MY TIME ON A LOOSER LIKE YOU - OPEN YOUR EYES AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOU -

I FORGIVE GOD IF HE HAS GIVEN YOU THE HONOR OF BEING A PARENT -

~

JUST SO YOU KNOW THE IDEA OF BEING A CO SIGNER ~ IS ASSUMING THE DEBT IF THEY FAIL TO HAVE THE ABILITY TO PAY

SO ONCE AGAIN - YOUR STUPID FOR CO SIGNING ~ FOR NOT EVEN KNOWING WHAT YOU GOT YOURSELF INTO .

BUT THAT GOES BACK TO YOU EXCEPTING RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN ACTIONS INSTEAD OF BLAMING EVERYONE ELSE.

AND YOUR WRONG IF YOU THINK I WORK AT A DEALER ~ I JUST HAVE RESPECT FOR PEOPLE THAT ONLY GET PAID BASED ON THEIR

PERFORMANCE - YOU ON THE OTHER HAND ARE SUCH A WIMP - YOU ARE PROBABLY THE TYPE THAT CAN'T EVEN LOOK PEOPLE IN THE EYE WHEN YOU TALK TO THEM...

`

OH YEA STUPID..... ONE MORE THING ~ I WAS LOOKING FOR A RARE CARE BEAR FOR MY DAUGHTER WHEN I CAME ACROSS YOUR DUMB a** POST - YOU CAN'T EVEN POST ON CRAIGS LIST - BUT YOU MENTIONED YOUR MAMA SO SHE MUST STILL WIPE YOUR A**

 

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Date: Sat, 30 May 2009 06:22:30 -0700

From: Mazarin

Subject: Re: craigslist post

To: XXXXXXXXX

 

You have a child? I weep for the future.

 

BTW: CAPS LOCK IS AWESOME!

 

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From: hi their <XXXXXXXX>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Saturday, May 30, 2009 11:09:43 PM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

YEA D**K HEAD I HAVE A KID JUST HAPPPENS ~ I ALSO HAVE A KID THAT GET HIGH HONOR'S EVERY YEAR THE ONLY THING YOU HAVE TO WEEP FOR IS THE POSITIVE CHANGE PEOPLE LIKE MY KID WILL MAKE

WHILE STUPID PEOPLE LIKE YOU DO NOTHING ....

 

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Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 21:22:30 -0700

From: Mazarin

Subject: Re: craigslist post

To: XXXXXXXXX

 

I'd check w/ your wife pal. If the kid's getting honors, I doubt any of its DNA is yours. And just to let you know, larger text doesn't make you more comprehensible. Ask your wife's kid what that means.

 

Good luck tomorrow!

 

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From: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Monday, June 1, 2009 10:42:36 PM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

PLEASE YOU ARE A DUMB MOTHER F*****R - I'M A SINGLE DAD TAUGHTER ALL SHE KNOWS -WIMPY A** PEOPLE LIKE YOU NEED THEIR MAMMA'S AND THEIR WIFE TO FIGHT THEIR BATTLES FOR THEM ~ THEN PLACE THE BLAME ON THEM FOR THEIR S*****Y PATHETIC LIFE . LOOSER LIKE YOU MAKE ME WANT TO PUKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

 

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Date: Tue, 2 June 2009 01:06:48 -0700

From: Mazarin

Subject: Re: craigslist post

To: XXXXXXXXX

 

Ok, let's get real for a moment, Professor Mushmouth:

 

I'm the dumb mother f****r? What about the guy that searches Craigslist so poorly that he came across a dealer rant posted in an auto sale forum while looking for Winnie the Pooh? I'm the guy who's using punctuation and grammar, getting yelled @ via text by someone who can't properly form sentences, has some sort of sexual infatuation with the CAPS LOCK key, and makes up words like "taughter," and I'm the dumb mother f****r? Ok, you got me, Mr. Foxworthy.

 

And don't take the fact that my family hasn't shunned me to the point of self-loathing and cranial atrophy that they're fighting my battles. Can you show me in my post where I placed blame on them for what the dealer, or anyone else did? I think we're forgetting this isn't your personal diary, but that this is an email to someone you don't know, that you decided to try and belittle because your Wal-Mart wage-a** can't afford a vehicle that doesn't say "Fisher Price" on the side?

 

Or am I such a loser that my wife is still by my side, and that I've been enough of a man to keep her happy that she hasn't left me and can't wait to keep me happy? Whereas the unfortunate recipient of the roofie cocktail you gave to the waitress @ the local Gulp 'n Blow left you to play "roving internet s***head that goes around emailing random people trying to make the sting of your failure @ being a man more palatable?" If I'm going too fast for you, I tried to use as little foul language as possible so your ex-wife's kid can read this to you.

 

So I leave you with this: Know-it-all know-nothings like you are a dime a dozen. You're the type of hollow meathead that has all the answers and can't wait to tell everyone else they're wrong, whether it's your low-expectation group of friends, or anyone else that will listen to the oral diarrhea that flows from your toothless hole. Do everyone a favor and whatever that void of a cranium tells you to do, do the exact opposite, and you might move up in your job to the point where you can afford a double-wide.

 

Enjoy your day.

 

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From: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Wednesday, June 3, 2009 3:44:01 AM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

Stupid ~ I have a Law degree, & I am a Partner in the firm (NOT TOO MENTION) I Have two local business - So f*** you and your bulls***... My Education far exceeds 85% of the population, My income is most likely, 100,000x's of what you could ever dream of ~ But I do have some respect for a REDNECK like you - smart people would never ~ Chase this conversation like you have ~Your ignorance pissed me off ... the dealership did nothing wrong ~ but the Dummy you are still has time to waste your useless life on me. My guess is you worked at Wal-mart & Just moved up to the pace bus driver - I understand your to busy now. Your last E-mail ...Did you have your sister do that for you? - You aren't capable to wright that..

 

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From: Mazarin

To: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

Sent: Wednesday, June 3, 2009 12:55:56 PM

Subject: Re: craigslist post

 

 

Wow. I need a moment. You say I had someone else write my last email – but the style of all my emails have been EXACTLY the same. Whereas your latest email suddenly has punctuation, sentence structure and the Caps Lock was off… Is this his ex-wife’s daughter? Listen buttercup, don’t let your weekend daddy bring you into his battles. He’s a big boy that probably dresses himself - he doesn’t need you to fight his battles. You may want to help him with writing and reading comprehension, though.

 

Now for Bosco – How am I supposed to believe that email? After everything you’ve shown me in all the emails you’ve sent me, now all-of-the-sudden you’re Robert Shapiro? This is like watching a video of a retarded paraplegic try and play basketball for several days, then suddenly start playing like Michael Jordan. How am I supposed to believe that? You see the bind I’m in.

 

Let’s use deductive reasoning here for a moment: If you’re truly an educated lawyer, why would you, A) go after a random person on the internet via several poorly written emails, and B) be dumb enough to be baited for my amusement into an internet argument you’re CLEARLY losing?

 

Here, I’ll even play your game for a moment, Mr. Dershowitz: If you are a lawyer, people like YOU are why the world is like it is! Unless you’re a pro-bono lawyer that works for children’s causes(which I highly doubt), you are the scum of the Earth. You people are nothing but frivolous lawsuit-pushing, ambulance-chasing, rape, murder, and child-molesting defenders of the lowest common denominator of society. YOU are the reason why medical insurance is so high and why honest, hard working doctors and offices have had to shut down. YOU are the reason why honest and selfless individuals now have to think twice before helping someone in distress, or why law-abiding people have to worry about burglars breaking into their own home and filing a lawsuit because THEY got injured in the process. You feed on calamity and grow on opportunism, regardless of right and wrong, and don’t – for one second – try to claim it as justice.

 

And even if you’re some lawyer who is more educated than 85% of the population, I applaud your ability to completely hide that trait flawlessly. All that money you supposedly make won’t help you for a second in the cold, dark Hell awaiting you once your essence leaves that foul, stinking husk of a corpse you currently reside in.

 

Before, I just thought you were some e-thug who needed something to do while the World of Warcraft servers were down. Now I think you’re lower than the dirt beneath my dog’s s***. I pray for the sake of your soul you’re just an e-thug.

 

Kind Regards.

 

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From: hi their <xxxxxxxxxxx>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Thursday, June 4, 2009 2:24:25 AM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

Couldn't even handle reading more of your wacked out crap ~ you turned out to be as stupid now as your 1st post on craigs list

still a f*** up and a looser ... I did what I wanted day's ago I told you you were a stupid dumb idiot then you still are and will always be - You got what you deseved ~ I bet it wasn't the 1st time - I'm sure it won't be the last ... F***OFF A** HOLE!

 

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From: Mazarin

To: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

Sent: Thursday, June 4, 2009 08:51:06 AM

Subject: Re: craigslist post

 

 

Couldn’t handle reading it anymore? I’m sorry, I forgot it’s not Friday yet, so your ex-wife’s daughter isn’t around to read and explain the words to you. Did the big words make your head hurt? Or did it hurt too much to read that I had you pegged the moment I opened your first attempt at trying to make me cry?

 

Listen, I know you’re not a lawyer, I know you’re not educated, and I know you’re not the owner of anything other than the fleshlight you bought after your wife left you. You tell me you’re this educated hotshot, yet you don’t know the difference between “loser†and “looser.†And you know what? That’s OK! Be proud of who you are! But the key to being happy is not trying to make everyone else as miserable as you; it’s trying to better yourself, regardless what others may say or do. Think of it this way - since I know you’re not a lawyer, you still have a chance at NOT going to Hell. And with the obvious fact that you’re NOT educated, they do say “Ignorance is bliss…â€

 

This is what educated and civilized people do: They try to better their fellow man.

 

So take this encounter as a gateway to a new outlook on life. Enjoy the weekends with your ex-wife’s daughter. Enjoy every level you gain on your Orc warrior. Enjoy the free rent of your mother’s basement. Enjoy that everything you do - No matter how much of a failure it can be, it will not affect the world in any way other than as an example of what not to do.

 

Best Wishes.

 

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From: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Friday, June 5, 2009 4:55:29 AM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

ANIMATED GIF OF A MONKEY URINATING ON ITSELF REMOVED FOR CONTENT

 

 

I CAN'T TELL YOU WHAT A STUPID F***ER YOU ARE - ANY MORE THAN I HAVE A READY -YOU HURT SO BAD INSIDE ... YOU WANT TO TRY TO MAKE ME FEEL UP SET THAT'S THE SAME REASON FOR YOU E-MAIL ABOUT THE DEALER - WHAT ARE YOU A PEDOPHILE, YOU THINK I'D EVERY SEND AN E-MAIL TO A SICK LOOSER LIKE YOU - IT'S ONE THING FOR YOU AN( ADULT) TO CHOOSE TO HAVE A SEXUAL THING WITH YOUR MOMMA - YOU ARE SUCH A STUPID F*** - YOU AND MOMMY DO HAVE A THING GOING ON - I KNOW THIS CAUSE YOU AREN'T, DEFENDING YOURSELF... BUT TRING TO HURT ME BY MAKING YOUR COMMENT'S DIRECTED TO A 9YR OLD FEMALE - THAT'S- AGAINST THE LAW TO START OFF WITH ... I KNOW YOUR MENTALLY RETARDED... BUT WHEN I PASS THIS ON TO THE DEALER AND THE STATE'S ATTORNEY - IT'S GOING TO COST YOU - YOUR F***ED UP - KNOW IT ALL

 

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From: Mazarin

To: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

Sent: Friday, June 5, 2009 09:19:48 AM

Subject: Re: craigslist post

 

 

Ok, now I know WITHOUT A DOUBT you've been lying to me about being educated and a lawyer.

 

I told you already, “looser†and “loser†are two different things, and you STILL don’t understand. I don’t think you’ll EVERY understand(See, I’m speaking like you!)

 

And what do you have on me, Perry Mason? Let’s try the biggest one, the accusation of being a pedophile. Ok, well, nothing remotely sexual was said to, insinuated, or directed at your ex-wife’s child, so that won’t work. How about who I am and where I live? Nope, don’t know that either. Too bad I didn’t send you a picture of a primate pissing on itself. That would have been the nail in my coffin.

 

I’d love for you to let me know how your little endeavor to the state goes, cause I’m sure they’ll take time out of their busy day to listen to some jerkwad cry to them about some guy that YOU initiated contact with over the internet made you mad via email in a completely non-threatening matter. And even if you did know who I was, you still wouldn’t have a case. I’m a “moron†and I know that, but hots*** Princeton lawyer doesn’t? You may want to check that chapter in your lawyer book again. Oh wait.

 

Speaking of not knowing a damn thing, you make this fuss that I’m in trouble, whereas you accuse me of somehow having a sexual attraction to my mother? OOOH I’M MAD NOW! I’M GOING TO THE STATE’S ATTORNEY! HE’LL SAVE ME!!! Your brilliant revelation is based on what, clairvoyance? You didn’t even give me time to defend that ridiculous statement. I can do that too: You must lick cat balls. SEE! YOU AREN’T, DEFENDING YOURSELF, SO, IT MUST, BE, TRUE,! What do I have to defend, Chief? Some d***head on the internet said so and now it's true? If anything you ever said was right, you'd still have a wife. But this is reality friend, and I see very clearly why she must have ran away screaming. So, since we’re making wild accusations, you’re a brilliant scholar! You’re ex wife was wrong for leaving you! I’m sure you bathe regularly! You can read and write above a 3rd grade level!

 

See how silly that is? So quit wasting your time. You’re not scaring me. You’re not making me sad. You’re not making me angry. But you’re sure as hell entertaining me more that anything on prime time TV.

 

Have a good weekend!

 

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From: hi their <xxxxxxxxx>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Saturday, June 6, 2009 2:44:12 AM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

DELETE ~ CAN'T DEAL WITH MORONS -U

MAKE ME SICK -

 

I TOLD YOU I'M NOT WASTING MY TIME W/ YOU STICK YOUR FINGER IN YOUR MOM A** - SHE'LL MAKE YOU SOME COOKIES

 

 

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From: Mazarin

To: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

Sent: Saturday, June 6, 2009 10:51:49 AM

Subject: Re: craigslist post

 

Ok boss, if that's the case, how do you look yourself in the mirror? You deal w/ a raging moron from the moment you wake, to the moment you pass out on the couch after a bottle of Jack. And just to let you know, I do agree with you - you're not wasting your time. Your replies are highly amusing.

 

I do have a legal question for you, though: Is that the proper response to a judge when one of your objections are overruled? I never thought telling the judge to stick a finger in his mom's a** would get you far in court. And how did you make the correlation of finger in a** = cookies? I don't know what kind of twisted childhood you had, but that tiny window into your adolescence makes alot of your replies even more disturbing.

 

And why such an infatuation with my mother? Didn't I see yours on an episode of G's Up - Ho's Down? I'm sure it's hard only being able to see your mom once a month pending good behavior, but I'm sure there's plenty of nice people in prison. And I'm sure she loved the balloon of crack you sent her for mother's day, even if she did have to wash it off, but you're a good son, right? After all, I'm sure your legal prowess got her the minimum sentence.

 

Good day to you.

 

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From: hi their <xxxxxxxxxx>

To: Mazarin

Sent: Sunday, June 14, 2009 3:00:01 AM

Subject: RE: craigslist post

 

OMG ~ THE JUDGE IS INTELLIGENT YOU HOWEVER ARE NOT- I'M SO GLADE THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE YOU

STUPID PEOPLE JUST TO CLARIFY - YOUR THE TYPE OF IDIOT THAT SEE'S A LAWYER CAUSE YOUR MOMMA TOLD YOU TO - INSTEAD OF TAKING A SHOT AT THE WHOLE PRO SE ~ B T W TOOK THE VET OUT FOR A SPIN PAID CASH DIDN'T NEED TO DO THE WHOLE FINANCE THING LIKE YOU

- JUST FOR YOUR INFO I DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER READING YOUR LAST 2 E-MAILS CAN'T STOMACH

IGNORANCE

 

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From: Mazarin

To: hi their <xxxxxxxxxxx>

Sent: Tuesday, June 16, 2009 7:18:31 PM

Subject: Re: craigslist post

 

 

Wow, did the disability check come in late this week? What took you so long to reply? I even stopped checking this account 'cause I thought you had enough, but I guess I was wrong. I will say I'm GLADE you're continuing to grace me with your a**-hattery. TV sucks, and with no more hockey to watch, I've needed some entertainment.

 

So tell me, Sgt. Subpoena: I'm sure the judge is quite intelligent, but you never answered my question on whether or not your manner of rebuttal is proper courtroom dialogue. Well, let me ask you another question you won't have an answer for: How on Earth were you able to spell "INTELLIGENT" but the spelling of "glad" and the proper use of contractions completely escape you?

 

I will say I'm jealous, though. I never had a Corvette bed. That's gotta be SO COOL. I'm sure you paid for it all in cash, too. Seeing as your Craigslist navigation skills are unparalleled, you probably found one w/ a couple of stains on it for cheap. I bet the guy was pissed, though, when you gave him the $20 all in change.

 

Oh wait. You said "vet." I apologize. Did you have fleas or ringworm or something? I bet it was a real hoot running around the trailer with the lampshade collar around your neck!

 

And furthermore, I AGAIN have proof you're no lawyer. You can't even lie correctly. You bring up the judge in a weak attempt to try and insult me using a comment from the very email you're replying to, then tell me you didn't read the last 2 emails I sent? Seriously?

 

If you can't stomach ignorance, you've gotta be bulimic, cause you sure as hell aren't anorexic in that department.

 

I bid you good day.

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mstieg Newbie

mstieg

Posted
Posted
That should make me cry at how dumb some people are, but your responses were just too funny. Great mixture of irony, quoting, logic, and comedic sarcasm. His responses were weak and repetative, but you still pulled enough out to rant & rave back for much longer than was needed. Conversations like this (if you can call it that), must be therapuetic in some way....like the Japanese places where they pay to trash a room and break stuff for a while.
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dstar88 Newbie

dstar88

Posted
Posted

you should send that to you old college or high school teacher or something lol

 

tell them, why did this person get a degree in law when their spelling is like this..?? and i barely even passed your class!?!?!

 

 

 

 

 

Daniel

 

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jwrape Newbie

jwrape

Posted
Posted

Wow! The ignorance is blinding..... I'm glad you were able to have that interaction with that guy. Maybe you have impacted his life in some small way enough that maybe, although he will never admit it, he will become a better person for it and not email random strangers just to insult them.

 

Can't stand those types that hide behind a keyboard.

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